HURT

i don't think i've ever been hurt so much by one person before. he says that he loves me but all of sudden his heart turns into stone. he's called me the most hurtful things. he knows exactly what to say to hurt me even more....the kind of things that just pierce right through the heart. i cry but he doesn't seem to care anymore.

i don't have any idea where this marriage is going. he obviously has a problem that he has to deal with within him, and until he deals with it, i think this is just going to keep happening over and over. no matter how many times we fight and make-up, he's never gonna change. i was foolish to think that i could change him.

i'm honestly thinking that we should separate for a while. i'm so tired of the disrespect, and him never putting himself in my shoes. if only he knew how hard it is be a mom, work and go to school. i feel that it's gonna get even worse that it already is. if i get into nursing school next year i really won't have any time to clean his damn house! coz really...to him, that is the issue... that i'm a freakin' slob that never cleans his house. i'm never appreciated for what i do. it doesn't matter that i take care of our daughter, or that i'm trying to go to school to get into a career that will make us financially stable.

my heart hurts, and it is broken. a mere 'sorry' won't heal this wound.